Why I Need to Get A Grip

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Guys. I have a serious problem. 

They say the first step on this very magical road to recovery, is admitting you actually have a problem. So here I am. 

I have a disease that consumes my life and it has recently taken over. 

I am weak. 

I cannot fight it.

 I am ashamed.

What might this disease be, you may ask? Oh, well answer that question, I shall! (Whoa there Yoda!) It's one word. One simple, yet crippling little word- PROCRASTINATION (maybe it's not so little). I know I'm not the only person in the world whose life laziness and procrastination has impacted, but I really need to get a grip. I constantly wait last minute to get a lot of important (and unimportant) things done, and that needs to stop. Or at least become less of the norm.

I was always the kid who (used their God-given common sense), finished assignments or anything really, ahead of time. My reasoning was simple; whatever it was, it would be done and I could have more time to relax, with my stress on level nonexistent (uhh yesss please). But recently, I've just opened the door to procrastination and let that sly little demon fester. I wish I was writing this post to reveal the cure to this disease, but sadly, I too am still searching. Though in a way, I think we all know the solution.  I think we're all familiar with the anti-laziness speeches people give to encourage productivity-

"All it takes is the right amount of motivation and will-power and blah blah blah..."

"Do it for the children..." (my fav)

"WWYPT: What would your parents think?" (makes me lol every time)

How about just getting up off your ass and doing what you have to (I've found that this works wonders for me). Was that a bid harsh? Maybe it was. A little. Oh well. I think we all need that kick up the... once in a while. I would personally hire someone to be that kicker for me... if I enjoyed verbal or physical abuse. But I do not. So, here we are. 

At this point, I feel it necessary to mention the fact that I have opted to write this blog post, instead of writing something else, far more important. But join me, as I overlook this minor little detail. Let us overlook this... together. 

So what exactly have we accomplished today? Well, for one, I didn't come here to be master-solver-of-mans-number-one-problem (look at me completely taking myself out of the equation. I'm quite good at it), I'm just putting myself on blast basically. That usually is motivation enough. Hopefully it has the same effect for some of you little Schwans (yes? no? maybe? probably not!). Whatever the case may be, I think this has to be one of the most counterproductive posts to ever grace the blogging forum. Oops. But let's look at it this way; from my procrastination this evening, we have simultaneously gotten some productivity. TAAA-DAAA (I'm also quite good at creating excuses and spinning practically anything to work in my favour).

I think it's best I stop here. Allow me to leave you with some actual advice (it's pretty good. I would listen to me if I were you). And here it is: 

Don't be like me. Be the opposite of me and hire a kicker if you really need one.

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